Mark Cella - Who is this infamous man?
His charm is so contagious vaccines have been created for it. Years ago he built a city out of blocks, today over six hundred thousand people live and work there. He is the only man to ever ace a rorschach test.
His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man's entire body. His personality is so magnetic, he is unable to carry credit cards. Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.
Mark Cella is the Greatest Man to Have Ever Lived
He never says something tastes like chicken, not even chicken. He's been known to cure narcolepsy just by walking into a room. His organ donation card also lists his beard. He has never used lip balm.
Mark Cella is a lover, not a fighter, but he's also a fighter, so don't get any ideas. People hang on his every word, even the prepositions. His reputation is expanding faster than the universe.
Mark Cella is the Most Exciting Man to Have Ever Lived
The things you have heard about me are all true... It is true that I lived in a cave one summer in the hills of the Serengeti after being gifted a wife by a local tribe leader. It is true that I owned three sports cars and that I wrecked five, and that I taught a horse to read my email for me.
See those nuts, they're there to make us thirsty, while I don't like being coerced, in this case I shall make an exception. He brakes down a pinata with a smile and a wink.
He lives by the motto "safety third." His blood smells like cologne. His hands feel like rich brown suede.
I express reservations. I usually avoid the public limelight after my fling with the Princess Dolealanee of Angola caused such a spectacle.
His charm is so contagious vaccines have been created for it. Years ago he built a city out of blocks, today over six hundred thousand people live and work there. He is the only man to ever ace a rorschach test.
His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man's entire body. His personality is so magnetic, he is unable to carry credit cards. Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.
Mark Cella is the Greatest Man to Have Ever Lived
He never says something tastes like chicken, not even chicken. He's been known to cure narcolepsy just by walking into a room. His organ donation card also lists his beard. He has never used lip balm.
Mark Cella is a lover, not a fighter, but he's also a fighter, so don't get any ideas. People hang on his every word, even the prepositions. His reputation is expanding faster than the universe.
Mark Cella is the Most Exciting Man to Have Ever Lived
The things you have heard about me are all true... It is true that I lived in a cave one summer in the hills of the Serengeti after being gifted a wife by a local tribe leader. It is true that I owned three sports cars and that I wrecked five, and that I taught a horse to read my email for me.
See those nuts, they're there to make us thirsty, while I don't like being coerced, in this case I shall make an exception. He brakes down a pinata with a smile and a wink.
He lives by the motto "safety third." His blood smells like cologne. His hands feel like rich brown suede.
I express reservations. I usually avoid the public limelight after my fling with the Princess Dolealanee of Angola caused such a spectacle.
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